// Part II: The Beauty of the South \\ Soy: I wonder if I have arrived in Arizona yet. Connie: Why, no, sir. You've arrived in South Carolina! Soy: South Carolina? Well, if I know my American geography (and I don't), I'm VERY close! Connie: Just walk west; you'll find it eventually. Soy: Ah, west -- the direction of noblemen! Connie: AND the direction of hoodlums, bandits, and happycows. Soy: Happycows go west? Connie: Yep, and Sadcows commit suicide by drowing in the Atlantic Ocean to the east. Soy: Who are you anyway? I mean, talking to strangers is like talking to cheese -- useless. Connie: I am Connie. Officer Reggie informed me that you were headed to Arizona, and that you'd naturally pass through South Carolina because you are blind and have no prominent sense of direction, and thus would arrive here. Soy: Are you a police officer too? Connie: No, I'm one of his six wives. Soy: Well, thanks for the advice. Just point me west! Connie: *sigh* I wish a handsome fellow like you could stick around for a while. Soy: I would, ma'am, but I don't need vision to know you're ugly. Connie: How the hell did you know that? Soy: I smell no beauty on you. Connie: Just go west, you lanky freak. Soy: Bye bye! [~to be continued~] « PREVIOUS || NEXT »